I want to dedicate this post to all my blogger pals out there. You have amazed me with your support and kindness, you have brought me laughter and tears. Will each and everyone of you take a huge thank you and a tight hug from me.
Most of you who visit my blog know, until a few months ago I hadn't even touched a computer, let alone heard of a blog. I think a fear of showing my ignorance made me make statements such as, "don't like the things, they kill the art of conversation" and many other foolish remarks. How stupid was I. Since starting my blog a few months ago, I'm sure it is one of the key elements in maintaining my sanity whilst being off work and being in the predicament I find myself now in.
I would like to tell you the story of how blogging came into my life and the mistrust I had at the beginning, and how people like you have totally changed my mind.
This time last year, I was in totally different circumstances to how I am at the moment. Math had gone into business, with two of his colleagues. This was an exciting time if not a little nerve racking. This would mean him spending time away from home, but as they say, you can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. I was working full time, in a job I adored, and often in the evening I had friends around to do their hair (once a hairdresser, always a hairdresser). Although I had had many different career changes, (nursing, teaching), I still had a few friends who would only let me cut their hair. Anyway it was always an excuse to open a bottle of wine and have a good chin-wag.
One of Maths partners was a woman who would come over to my home to discuss business. I would cook meals for her and she even stayed over a few times.
There are a some human behaviours that really get to me and bring out a protective side of my nature, one of these is domestic violence.
This woman told me the most horrendous stories of her life, from the nightmares of her previous marriage, how hard things had been for her as a child. Also the reason she worked away from home now, leaving behind her seven year old daughter to be bought up by her husband, who she hated and who was violent towards her!!!
At first my heart went out to her, but doubts started to cross my mind. Why would any mother leave her child in the hands of a violent man? Also many of the other stories became unstuck when I asked for more details, you know the sort of things women, particularly mothers ask.
My mind was taken elsewhere, and her problems became less important to me, when I had a breast cancer scare, (the said woman suddenly became an expert on this subject also). It was only a week I had to wait for the results from my biopsy, but it changed a whole lot of things in my head.
I re-evaluated my life as to what is important to me and what most definitely wasn't.
Along with this I had had a fall at work and the problems with my hip started. I was unable to work, but since I had received the results of my breast biopsy, which were negative, none of this mattered to me. I just wanted to celebrate what I did have, and not that which I did not have.
Things came to pass that this woman had created all these attention seeking stories and had a history of doing so with others in the past.
Unfortunately no one had passed on how she embroils herself into others lives, and becomes intent on creating trouble. In fairness, she was a clever lady and didn't let others know her comings and goings, so many of our associates would be unaware of her involvements.
Math left the partnership and started afresh, I breathed a sigh of relief that she would not be involved in any more of our business transactions. I just could not understand why someone would make-up such harmful stories and was pleased that she would no longer be in our lives!!!!!!
This was a big oversight on my part, never realising how naive I was. Actually it wasn't naivety, I just never thought for a moment that someone would want to hurt me so much when all I had ever done was to show them kindness and support. People have told me that the actions she then followed on to do, were an act of jealousy. But how could she possibly be jealous of me? I am about to have a major operation, not knowing if I can ever return to work. She has a brilliant career, and is in a far more affluent position than me!!! It didn't make any sense. There again non of what she had said or did were the actions of a reasonable person.
A friend of mine who had also had dealings with her, rang and asked if I knew that she was writing about me on her blog. I explained that I didn't even know what a blog was, she gave me a quick insight into what a blog was , and how to get onto her site.
To say that I was stunned to see the lies and malicious statements she had published on her blog, would be an understatement. The pain and heartbreak this caused me did not cease after I had contacted her to ask why she was hurting me by making up these things.
In fact this contact only seemed to encourage her, now she knew that I had knowledge of her blog. The lies and story's continued, and as she informed me, there wasn't a dam thing I could do.
It was not a simple case of ignoring it, as she was inviting people I knew, and persons involved in our business and work to read it.
I tried to contact someone within Blogger for help, but all I could do was to flag her site up to show an objection at its content.
It was devastating to watch, the lies had evil undertones to them. Shocked by these actions
I sort legal advise, an expensive solution that I could have done without, but something had to be done as she seemed out of control.
The blog was removed after the intervention of our lawyer, and now, almost a year later the occasional silly statements are put back up in the header bar, but these really just show how unstable she is.
So back to my story. The blogging world was my enemy, it had hurt me so badly and made me feel that I could be attacked without any means to defend myself. I thought it a very dangerous piece of apparatus, that needed some sort of policing.
So when I was at an all time low, and my mobility was making me a prisoner within my own home, Math suggested I start my own blog about my ups and downs. After a lot of thought, 'better the enemy you know, than one you know zilch about' , and with much trepidation, I started Queenie's Random Ramblings, not sure how I would construct it.
Not long after I'd published my first post, my very first comment appeared from Maryam, then la bella mammina. I was wary at first, then I grasped the nettle and visited their blogs. Maryams Marakesh opened my eyes to such wonderful scenery, la bellina mammina told me about her busy life with her three sons.
I grew bolder and visited more blogs, and guess what? Yes sure, more bloggers visited me.
I have shared laughter and tears, loves and losses, learned more about some of my passions than a library full of books could teach me. Each day I can't wait to see how my bloggster pals are doing, or what news they have to share. Is it a recipe of a meal they had, a joke they want to share?
Akelamalu, a friend of mine, recently went into hospital, and we knew she would be off work for a while. So I talked her into starting a blog to fill out her time. I do believe she enjoys her blog and it has also been way for her t
o share her recovery.
So I would just like to take this opportunity to thank each and everyone of you, and you all know who you are, for making this woman extremely happy by sharing your talents, your ups & downs, your humour, and most of all yourselves, on this wonderful thing called a
BLOG.....
